Monday, June 25, 2007

DON'T TOUCH ME!

I read that a young Middle School student received detention for putting his arm around his girlfriend. It seems as if it would have been an innocent gesture, however this particular school has a “NO TOUCH” policy.I think I can understand the mentality behind this policy. With a firm NO TOUCH policy in effect it would certainly cut down on the physical incidents of bullying. It also cuts down on one of human kinds most basic and necessary instincts/needs; to touch and be touched.

There are those who claim this no touch policy is a violation of our First Amendment Rights, perhaps so…touching is certainly one way in which we express ourselves. I think whether it is a violation or not is best left up to the legal minds to decide. Is it right however, for a school or any institution to implement a policy of NO TOUCH? That is open for discussion.

I consider myself to be an expert on bullying, based on my experiences and research. I know that bullying takes on numerous forms and perhaps foremost in our minds is physical bullying. Goodness knows when I was in my bullying years I was involved in my share of physical bullying. However, if you were to ask a present day student what the majority of bullying is, physical or emotional, I bet the answer would be a hands down EMOTIONAL BULLYING.

Emotional bullying is making someone feel as if they are less than they are. Calling someone names, starting rumors about someone or ostracizing them, ignoring them, all forms of EMOTIONAL BULLYING! All destructive, all intended to make someone feel bad about themselves. I recently had the opportunity to meet a woman who’s daughter committed “bullycide” (see jaredstory.com or bullypolice.org). “Bulycide” is the name given to suicide victims who choose to take their own lives to avoid being bullied. This woman shared the story of her daughter’s bullycide. It seems she was being emotionally bullied by her ex-friends, no longer part of the “group” for whatever reason. They turned to sending her notes and telling her she was worthless, “go home and kill yourself” they said and wrote to her in notes. She did. So, is a NO TOUCH policy effective in ending bullying and harassment? Maybe, but teaching manners, appreciation of diversity and education that we are all in this life together and depend upon each other might be a better way to help stop bullying. What do you think? Your opinions and comments are always welcome, don’t forget to visit my website www.youbigbully.com

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